April Fools: The Jadis Question

Hope you enjoyed our April Fools jokes this year!

NarniaWeb has received various reports from Fox/Walden concerning Jadis’ involvement with The Chronicles of Narnia: The Magician’s Nephew. Fans of the book will doubtless remember how Jadis is awakened by Digory and Polly as they explore the ruins of a destroyed world; however, her involvement in the production of the upcoming film adaptation remains foggy.

Last Wednesday at a conference in East Timor Hillary Uss, a spokesperson for Walden Media mentioned that Jadis’ origins may have to be different in the upcoming film, from what they are in the books. “The one thing we don’t want the audience thinking,”Β Uss said, “is that Digory is responsible for the evil that befalls Narnia. Doing so would give the wrong impression to the viewers of the film.” To remedy this, it seems as if the filmmakers are going to have Digory and Polly arrive in Charn soon after Jadis’ use of the Deplorable Word. “I think that the audience will be really impressed with some of the shots that we have planned. The city is going to be absolutely destroyed! This destruction is obviously Jadis’ doing.”Β Uss went on to say, “If everything goes well, the film will clearly show that Uncle Andrew is the one that is responsible for the witch entering the young world of Narnia. We hope to accomplish this by showing the manner in which he forces the children into the recently destroyed Charn. It also gives a great opportunity to show Jadis strong-arming the children, and will give a really great dynamic between the three characters.”

Hillary UssΒ went on to elaborate on the character of Jadis. “We’re beginning to look for actresses who would be willing to play such a sinister character,” she said. “Tilda Swinton is a brilliant actress, but many fans of the book seem to be getting angry with her involvement in the films, and have been slapping the floor in frustration at seeing her in Prince Caspian and The Voyage of the Dawn Treader. We must also face the fact that Tilda has aged considerably since the filming of The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. For these reasons, Fox thought that it might be better to remove her from any future films.” When questioned about the actresses interested in the role, she replied, “I’m not at liberty to say at this point, but there are several teenage superstars driving the streets of Hollywood these days. Our casting department has been in contact with a good number of them already, and we have already made a great deal of progress in finding the next White Witch.” One such superstar reported to have been approached is teen sensation Rebecca Black, whose video “Friday” went viral recently. When questioned about this,Β Uss was quoted as saying, “Well, I can’t confirm that of course, but I’ll say that if Black was chosen, it would be the sort of fit for which we’re looking. She’s modern, current, and since she’s been bullied over her incredible music video, she’ll understand the bullying themes of this film, which will give her even more insight into the character we’re trying to portray.”Β Hillary UssΒ went on to say that it is Fox/Walden’s hope that using a younger actress to portray Jadis will place more pressure on the relationship that Jadis has with Digory and Polly. “This film will really help modern teenagers see just how bad bullying can be, and just how big of a threat that bullies can pose.”

Further developments on this late breaking story will be coming soon as more is revealed to us within the next few days.

105 Responses

  1. Aslan's Meadow says:

    πŸ˜‰ okay…sure…

  2. glumPuddle says:

    For the record, I had no knowledge of this joke. When it comes true, blame DiGoRyKiRkE!

  3. Starlily says:

    Lol! Hillary Uss! Haha…"slapping the floor in frustration"…hahaha! "Teenage superstars"…"Rebecca Black"…"bullying themes"!!!! Lol, I love this! What a crazy movie that would be!

  4. Pepper Darcy says:

    you know it's April Fools? I came over JUST to get a laugh πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ It's 'my bad' if it does come true πŸ˜› But otherwise, LOL! πŸ˜€ I love how Narnia sites always pull this! πŸ˜€

  5. Pepper Darcy says:

    you mean… it might be real? If it is… that's *awful* ideas… why shouldn't Diggory be responsible?! :/ *blinks owlishly* but, looking at the date, I'm going to hold out it's a joke! *tries laughing nervously*

  6. Moze says:

    "We must also face the fact that Tilda has aged considerably since the filming of The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe."

    Not going to win any awards for tact with a comment like that, are you, Hilary?

    It's only (only!) been, what, six, seven years since the first film? How "considerable" could the aging have been? Is there incipient cronism? And how would this be a liability in depicting an evil witch–particularly if one were to assume that the newly-made Narnia had the effect of enyouthifying her?

    And I'd feel sort of disappointed if anyone but Tilda Swinton portrayed Jadis: she made and earned that role, and she's certainly beautiful enough to pull off the otherworldly and haughty beauty of the despot of Charn!

  7. wolfloversk says:

    XD

  8. Son of Adam no.1 says:

    Of course Tilda will play WW, she NEEDS to.

    Phew, for a moment there, I thought that that was REAL!!!

  9. Celestial says:

    I thought they were serious until they mentioned Rebecca Black. Great April Fools!

  10. Sarah says:

    Oh i was almost taken in until i saw the post date. Whewwwww.

  11. Austra says:

    Oh my goodness! But it WAS Digory's fault! C. S. Lewis says so! And what's more, the witch wasn't just a bully; she was a tyrant! A hundred times worse than Miraz!

    IT WAS /SO/ DIGORY'S FAULT!!!

  12. Liberty Hoffman says:

    LOL

  13. WarriorOfNarnia says:

    Hardy har

  14. Matt Wills says:

    :o)

    I got half way through the first paragraph before I twigged. Fair play, and nice use of misdirection with the marshwiggle nonsense.

  15. Not Of This World says:

    One of the best parts of that story for me is when, even after his mistake, Aslan helps Digory by giving him the apple that had just grown on the Tree of Protection. It shows God's grace. Ithink this is another April Fools Day joke. ALRIGHT ENOUGH!!!!! πŸ™‚

  16. andrew_harmon16 says:

    HAHA! The sad thing is I will not be at all shocked when most of this actually happens! (Minus the ditching Tilda part, they love her!)

  17. Lucy Took says:

    I thought that jokes only became fact if RILLIAN posts them

  18. Pepper Darcy says:

    besides, think of this, guys: they have NOT even confirmed or greenlit MN yet. So how could they be making desisions like this? πŸ˜€ It's a joke! I'm sure πŸ˜€

  19. Pepper Darcy says:

    okay, I finished reading this. It's a joke. Cuz over on Narniafans.com they said Black was going to be POLLY! LOLOLOLOL! Funny! Besides, I heard somewhere else about them wanting tilda to be Jadis, in a more official thing πŸ™‚

    P.S. I didn't slap the floor about Tilda being in PC/VotDT πŸ˜€ I loved it πŸ˜€

  20. Not Of This World says:

    I hope NarniaWeb dosen't post any important real stories today because I wouldn't belive it
    πŸ™‚

  21. FriendOfNarnia2 says:

    They always wait until April 2nd to post the "real" stories.

  22. Daniel James says:

    WHAT?? NOO! TILDA SWINTON WAS A PERFECT JADIS! I'm so mad that I'm not going to watch MN ever! I'm giving up on the Narnia Franchise. =(

    (just kidding, haha. @DiGoRyKiRkE, I love how we both wrote posts concerning Rebecca Black. Check out my post on NarniaFans from this morning. πŸ˜‰ )

  23. Bonnefoy says:

    If Old Tilda goes fishing, Can Young Little baleine* (baleine * in approximate french) take place ?
    Si cette Vieille Tilda part Γ  la pΓͺche, la Petite SirΓ¨ne peut-elle la remplacer ?
    (notice fabulous progress in english language)(never forget Andersen)(it's only on 1st April)

  24. Not Of This World says:

    Who's Rebecca Black?

  25. Lover of Narnia says:

    News post in April 1st can never be trusted. *cocks her detective hat* but it's always good for a great laugh! πŸ˜€

    Rebecca black!? πŸ˜› I know for a fact many people on NW hate her music video. If they got her for Jadis…. *laughs and shakes head*

  26. Griffle says:

    Well, if we're talking about Tilda not appearing in MN, I think that's highly plausible. Didn't Tilda have a three picture deal? If so, she's not obliged to do another one, and why would she? She's an academy Award winning actress. πŸ˜‰

  27. WillowofNarnia says:

    Riiiiiiiiight! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜› Nice one! I LOVE Tilda! Rebecca Black? Sure…. πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  28. Eustace says:

    This would be a really bad movie. I so hope it doesn't come true.And if does, which movie will be worse: VODT or MN?

  29. emijoy says:

    I highly doubt this is real. If it were Digory Kirke would have given us his sources

  30. emijoy says:

    Rebecca Black aka Jadis playing a teenage witch bullying Polly and Digory??? lol

  31. Lys Aranel says:

    I think the main phrase to consider here is "slapping the floor". A well known acronym of April Fool's is "I Slap Floor".

    It's a joke, folks. No one speaks that unprofessionally when giving quotes to the media. They wouldn't dare.

  32. Atarah says:

    Whoever posted this is conspiring with narniafans.com.

    Lys beat me to it, but the key phrase in this story is, "slapping the floor."

  33. Shastafan says:

    I'll remember that! XD

  34. Daniel James says:

    Hahaha, we didn't quite conspire together, but we had very similar ideas. I posted a story on NarniaFans today about Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black being cast as Digory and Polly, respectively. Click on my name above to see the post.

    Last year, Narniaweb and NarniaFans did conspire together; they switched their website banners so that if you went to NarniaFans, you'd see the banner saying "Welcome to NarniWeb," and vice versa.

    @NarniWeb: Great minds think alike. πŸ˜‰

  35. Sir Jack says:

    I would realy be scared if Rilian would have posted that..

  36. ShyGaladriel says:

    Ok, whew. They had me for a second there. LOL!

  37. reepicheep's_fangirl says:

    *gaging* JUSTIN BIEBER?! Haha, poor NarniaFans! My sympathy goes out to whomever forgot the date and saw THAT post! And i thought the whole thing about "This film will really help modern teenagers see just how bad bullying can be, and just how big of a threat that bullies can pose" was a scary joke!It IS a joke….right?

  38. Reepicheep775 says:

    β€œThe one thing we don’t want the audience thinking,” Uss said, β€œis that Digory is responsible for the evil that befalls Narnia. Doing so would give the wrong impression to the viewers of the film.”

    That is just diabolical…

  39. reepicheep's_fangirl says:

    I just read your post, Daniel, and if you or anyone else is interested I left a comment with the first few lines of "Never Eat Apples", which I am sure would become an instant hit. πŸ˜€

  40. Peter says:

    Tilda Swinton? She's EVIL. That's why she makes a perfect white witch!!!

  41. Christ's girl says:

    Great April Fool's Day Joke! πŸ˜€ πŸ™‚ πŸ˜› πŸ˜‰ It IS a joke, right?!?!???

  42. Ricasso says:

    "Hillary Uss" = "Hilarious"

    Nice try, but too many details to be believable.

  43. The Rose-Tree Dryad says:

    I bet they'll change the Deplorable Word to the Deplorable Song.

  44. StevoBaggins says:

    That post was brilliant, I might add!

  45. WilliamMOseleyand Skandarcrush says:

    Yea.

    I despise that song, "Friday". It's so funny when she say, "yesterday was Thursday, Today is Friday, Tomorrow is Saturday. Then, Sunday comes afterwards." I died at that part!! And her voice is kinda annoying. SO THANKFUL this a joke……. hopefully!

  46. I think it is utterly rediculous that they don't want to stick to the books. Not portraying the fact that Digory is responsible for Jadis appearing in Narnia is like taking out the basis of the entire story. It is out of that storyline that he gets the magical apple that protects Narnia and it is by this storyline that he eventually saves his dying mom. I think a lot of narnia fans are going to be troubled and annoyed by this development. For me this storyline is important becaus it shows how we all fall into temptation (Digory striking the bell) and the redemption we can have we can have (his redeeming the bad thing he did by retriving the apple and giving it to Aslan

  47. evan rodriguez says:

    Wow nice prank… The only thing worse u could have told us was that charlie sheen was playing uncle andrew… Hahahaha very funny the Rose-Tree Dryad

  48. Aslie says:

    Hahahaahaha this is a really good joke! I love it! πŸ˜€

  49. Raeley says:

    *Laughs* Very funny guys. I actually freaked out until I realized it was April Fool's day. I was like "WHAT… WHAT… I… SERIOUSLY… WHAT!?" Tilda is a gorgeous and powerful actor, they could never replace her with Rebecca Black, she is obviously not a good actress. *Sigh* If I was old, I would have had a heart attack!

  50. Josh says:

    HAHA! I came to Narniaweb looking for the jokes today. This certainly didn't let me down. Especially when so many people were "scared" by it.

  51. Mayor Wilkins says:

    I despise April Fool's Day.
    That said, at least I was prepared today. πŸ˜›
    In all seriousness, Tilda has to come back.

  52. HighQueen_Of_LanternWaste says:

    Woo, haven't posted in awhile! Great joke. All Narnia fans needed was a little Rebecca Black in their lives

  53. aravis_tarkina says:

    "slapping the floor" in paragraph two? Oh, yeah. I SLAP FLOOR.

  54. Lillyput90 says:

    The question we are all wanting and answer to is how on earth anyone expected us to believe that anyone would have a conference in East Timor????? Let alone Mr. Hillary Uss (Hilarious), who was previously unattached to the project. He sounds a bit fishy to me………lol. So copying Narniafans.com anyway, Rebecca Black and Justin Beiber are reportedly playing the roles of Polly and Digory over there, so Rebecca Black, by the sound of things is doing all the female roles in the film!!! Next she'll be Aunt Letty…..

  55. NarnianBadger says:

    *rolls on the floor laughing a second time* Rebecca Black?! officially one of your most hilarious April Fools ever!!

  56. pselpevensie says:

    is this fact or an april fool's day joke… i mean seriously, rebecca black as jadis? tilda is jadis!

  57. Duffleglum says:

    Remember the time when they did a fools joke report that they were planning on having a Susan-Caspian romance plot in PC???

    And then it actually happened? oh how angry I was… XD

  58. Kathryn says:

    I don't like the sound of that AT ALL!!!! Digory was never blamed NOR did it ever seem like he was blamed for bringing Jadis into Narnia. I think they should leave it how C.S. Lewis wrote it!

  59. Christy Ford says:

    I didn't this closely enough to notice the parts that made it glaringly obviously that was fake. Plus I forgot that today is April 1st. Well played, NarniaWeb! You really had me going.